Remind me to…

I have trouble remembering things. This could be due to the “fibro fog” of fibromyalgia, the lack of deep sleep by either fibromyalgia or rheumatoid arthritis or the combination of both. Or maybe I’m just a bit ditzy?

No matter what the cause, I have gathered my support crew around me to help out. If somebody wants me to do something, I put the responsibility back on to them. I say, “check in with me in an hour and ask me if I have done it”. Or “remind me to leave to pick up L from work at 7pm please.

My close family and friends know what I’m like. I have emphasized with them that I will not be offended if they check up with me and remind me about things.

Of course I just plain forget at times, but none of us is perfect and I feel that so long as I try my best, that is all that can be expected of me. It is great that my forgetfulness has not resulted in tragedy, just a little waiting time.

There is an advertisement on TV in New Zealand about a stressed mother not getting her 3pm pick me up and taking her confused looking young son (complete with grubby knees and torn clothes) to ballet dressed in a tutu over his clothes and her equally confused daughter to football dressed in oversized rugby jersey.

When my children were young, I was forever worried that I would take the wrong child to an appointment. Luckily these days, my children are all old enough to take me to appointments if necessary. I believe that getting them to help me out physically and also with being responsible about our schedule helped them to learn responsibility and they have grown into fine young adults.

If remembering appointments is a challenge for you, how can you get others to help you and take the stress off yourself?

If you enjoyed this article and would like to read more articles that I have written I invite you to visit my website

I am a survivor from a number of illnesses, including Fibromyalgia and Rheumatoid Arthritis. I live happily in defiance of illness with my family on a kiwifruit orchard near Tauranga, New Zealand, living the life I love and doing the things I enjoy and believe are important.

I am the author of “The Crystal Diary” written about my late daughter, published in April 2012. “Living Happily in Defiance of Illness” was published in August 2012, it is healing guidebook for people affected by chronic illness. Both books are available in printed format and the Defiance book is available in EBook format for instant download 🙂



  1. I plopped down in my office chair to check my email while talking to my sister, who was asking me to affirm plans regarding her wanting to grab my little ones for some play time at the park… and I pulled up your article and it was right on time. The forgetfulness that you describe … is MY reality. Is it because of Fibromyalgia? Is it the medications? Is it a side effect of the “twenty-eleven” meds that I’ve tried in an unsuccessful effort to find relief? Am I just a bit of a “flake”? Yes, yes.. and most certainly, yes! But I love the point that you made re: putting the load back on others by telling them to check in with you at a certain point. I must admit that I do, at times, become agitated by being asked “Did you remember….?” My agitation is with myself… and the great dissonance between the person that I am and the person that I envision myself being. I’m going to work on that b/c if “I” know I’m forgetful, then being “nippy” isn’t going to help. Thanks for this piece!!

    1. Thanks for taking the time to respond with your feedback. If I can help just one person a day, I’m leading a useful and fulfilling life 🙂

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